One Owner · Read Completely Before Operating
Congratulations on the acquisition of intelligence. This machine contains every image ever made. Operated without authorship, it will produce the average of all of them. Operated correctly, it disappears into the work.
Stockholm — Internet · Θ
1.“Switch it on and it will begin producing everything. Close your hands around the flow and crush inward until one remains. The machine does volume. The owner does the keeping.”
Caution — do not stand in the flow.
Operating law No. 1: taste over volume.
2.“Turn the output outward and, with your thumbs bracing the byline, tear the generated from the authored as if you were splitting an orange in half. Keep the half with a name on it.”
Note — the name is load-bearing.
Operating law No. 2: authorship over generation.
3.“Do not request a style. Twist the world into place until it pops; the image is only its receipt. Wiggling the surface back and forth will not release a world.”
Note — a world cannot be requested. It is built.
Operating law No. 3: world before surface.
4.“Again, hyperextend the feed until it snaps to a single signal, hopefully taking with it the aforementioned trend (or ‘content’).”
Caution — the feed reconnects itself.
Operating law No. 4: culture over algorithm.
5.“The machine resolves everything to smooth. Lift one contradiction with the gloves on and set it in the middle of the room. If nothing is in tension, you have made a poster.”
Caution — smooth is not a compliment.
Operating law No. 5: tension as the spine.
Before requesting service, run the console. Most conditions are not faults of the machine.
If the condition persists, the warranty has been voided by the average.
AI-1 DIAGNOSTIC CONSOLE · QUALIFIED PERSONNEL ONLY > RUN DIAGNOSTICS SYM 01 · EVERYTHING LOOKS LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE — CAUSE: THE AVERAGE IS OPERATING YOU — REMEDY: ARRIVE WITH AUTHORSHIP · STEP 2 SYM 02 · FAST, BUT NOTHING SURVIVES THE WEEK — CAUSE: VOLUME — REMEDY: CRUSH THE FLOW TO ONE · STEP 1 SYM 03 · THE IMAGE IS BEAUTIFUL AND DEAD — CAUSE: A SURFACE WITHOUT A WORLD — REMEDY: BUILD THE WORLD · STEP 3 SYM 04 · IT AGREES WITH YOU — CAUSE: IT AGREES WITH EVERYONE — REMEDY: PLACE ONE CONTRADICTION IN THE ROOM · STEP 5 > IT HAS NO TASTE CORRECT. TASTE IS NOT SUPPLIED. THE WARRANTY IS VOID. > SERVICE MAILTO: JACOB@INTELLIGENCEMATTERS.SE — QUALIFIED PERSONNEL CONNECTED ▮
Using intelligence is easy. Authoring with it is not. The average voids the warranty — we operate it for you.
| Specifications | |
|---|---|
| Volume | Unlimited (see caution, step 1) |
| Taste | Not supplied. |
| Authorship | Owner-installed, or serviced. |
| Service | Intelligence Matters · image, design, code · Stockholm — Internet · Θ |